Lisa Desatnik
Remember Karyl As A True Friend
It had been years since Karyl Cunningham and I had last seen each other. In fact, admittedly we had a hard time remembering where we met, but that didn’t seem to matter. Within in minutes I felt as I was sitting across the table from a very close friend.
That is Karyl’s way. When you speak, she listens with careful focus. She naturally inspires others to want to do more, be more, achieve more. Her smile leaves you with a strong reminder that she is someone who cares.
Ironically I learned she has the role now of another woman who also held a special place in my heart, Toni Miles. Karyl is executive director of the YMCA of Greater Cincinnati’s Black and Latino Achiever’s Program which provides teens with essential tools for pursuing higher education and identifying career opportunities. One hundred percent of the Program’s high school seniors graduate high school, with over ninety percent entering post secondary education and over eighty percent, completing college, earning Associate’s or Bachelor’s degrees. I remember well seeing the importance of this work during the five years I did public relations work for the Y.
It is no wonder Karyl is the recipient of numerous community activity awards, including the 2016 Venue Magazine Women of Influence Award, 2006 Star Award, Over-the-Rhine Chamber of Commerce, for individual community contribution; Urban All-American Achievement Award, Toledo, Ohio; and Ohio State Assembly Community Service Recognition.
She has served on several nonprofit boards, including the Leadership Council, Seton High School, and Healthy Moms and Babes. And she serves on the boards of the Over-the-Rhine Chamber of Commerce, the OTR Foundation and the 3CDC New Market Funds Advisory board and member of the Citizen Advisory Panel for Agenda 360.
Let’s learn more about Karyl.
Lisa: Please tell us about a life experience that may have been difficult or challenging, but ended up being a positive growth lesson.
Karyl: I would say that the most difficult challenge for me, was as young women beginning my first non-profit position in my hometown of Toledo, Ohio. After working there about a year, I was approached by my employer who had an interested in transferring me to Covington, Kentucky to open up a satellite office that would serve individuals who were underemployed or unemployed and interested in starting a career in retail sales. To say the least, I was nervous and skeptical in moving from my hometown, which at the time felt so final. In hindsight, it was one of the best decisions that I made. As a result of this move, I fell in love with Cincinnati and decided to take a leap of faith and look for other opportunities that would align to my skills, knowledge and abilities in the field of education or non-profit work. I overcame my fear of leaving my safe place and jumping right in! And I am still here, after 30 plus years.
Lisa: What are some of your greatest passions and how do they impact your career and life choices?
Karyl: Definitely I’d say connecting with people, reading history/novels and cooking. In life…we are all connected, somehow and in some way, and it is a beautiful thing. People can impact your life in so many good ways, ways that give us hope, gives us advise and teaches us to advance to our greater good! History teaches us so much about who we are, why we are – and supplies us with a foundation and framework for making decisions in both our personal and professional lives. Cooking allows us to blend people and conversation over great bounty!
Lisa: What is the greatest legacy or impact that you hope to be remembered by when others think about you?
Karyl: I want people to remember me as someone who was always honest, trustworthy and a true friend! Someone who made a difference!
Lisa: What is one of your favorite pieces of advice and why?
Karyl: Never allow anyone’s negative opinion of you, become your reality! That advice says it all!
Nick Champions Lives
Today I wanted to introduce you to someone who has championed the lives of more than 265,000 high school and college students. Nick Jackson commands the stage. When he gets in front of audiences he lifts them to a higher place, gets them excited and inspired. It truly is a gift and he has dedicated his adult life to sharing that gift with as many people as he can.
Nick is the first African-American male teacher and coach at Norwood High School in Cincinnati, later going to Ft Thomas Independent School District in Northern Kentucky. If you know him, it would come as no surprise to learn he coached two football teams to state championships, ever once having a losing season. Shortly after, he was selected by NBC, Showtime and Fox Sports’ Cris Collinsworth to become the national spokesperson for a nonprofit called UGive.org. Today, through Nick’s organization – NickJacksonSpeaks.com – he gives transformational speeches to packed events.
Let’s learn more about him.
Lisa: You have devoted your adult life and career to inspiring and empowering people. Where does your inspiration draw from?
Nick: My inspiration comes from inside me. Deep, deep inside me there is a young child that was told that the world doesn’t change nor care about you. The best you’ll be able to do is to “fit in it!”
Lisa: Was there a young experience that influenced your life?
Nick: Absolutely, my grandparents are phenomenal. Every time we spoke (they’ve passed) there was another reason to walk away from the conversation uplifted. They had this ability in my life to convey a message of love and empowerment at the same time. I’d walk into their conversations feeling beat down by struggling with an ability difference and the frustration of the day. They would always remind me of the big picture. And in doing this they would remind me that I’m a big part of this bigger picture.
So – keep fighting the good fight.
Lisa: What has driven you to this mission?
Nick: My biggest driving force is the amount of people out there that don’t have positive role models, parents or grandparents that point them in this positive direction.
Lisa: Who is someone that is a role model to you and why.
Nick: My grandfather. I mean he was just awesome! He had a way to connect that was as much spiritual as it was physical. He had a way of making you believe that you are special, and the outcome of your awesomeness opens doors for others to also be awesome!
Lisa: When others think about or remember you, how would you like to be remembered?
Nick: I would love to be remembered as the guy that helped others remember their awesomeness. I’d love to be remembered as the coach that was coaching people in life and the man that gave to them without expectation of return.
Lisa: What is something about you that people may be surprised to learn?
Nick: I have a serious fear of squirrels they freak me out!
Lisa: Do you have any stories of how one of your talks made an impact on your audience and yourself?
Nick: Wow where to start –
The two that come to mind are ones that are very close to my heart. I remember when I first started speaking I was at an elementary school called Crosby Elementary. I spoke to the students about never giving up no matter what other people say your disability is and also knowing that your ability will never be given to you by man. A young man stood up in the back of the room. He was leaning against the wall and he said he was a person with a disability. He explained after hearing our speech how he wouldn’t let other people’s thoughts of his ability hold him down – it was beautiful.
The next story is very similar. We were able to speak at a convention in Texas before thousands of students were with multiple races represented. As I stood there, I noticed that the Latino students, the African-American students and the Caucasian students all sat in separate sections of the auditorium. During the speech we talked about being one, having one voice, and being forgiven together in unison. The crowd of many colors, faiths and backgrounds came together as one in the hallway and we as one took the best selfies ever!
This Coach Loves His Work
Written by my Good Things Going Around intern, Isabella Noe, a senior at Walnut Hills High School in Cincinnati
I recently had the pleasure of meeting Coach Mike Holmes. He first started playing basketball in 1996, and is now in his fourth year of coaching basketball both for Swish Spirit and as an assistant at Mariemont High School. Swish Spirit is “a unique program that offers basketball instruction to children and young adults who have disabilities. In addition to instruction, Swish Spirit provides children of all abilities the opportunity to be part of a team within a basketball league” . A typical practice consists of working on dribbling, passing, and scrimmaging. The team plays other teams like it in the area, such as the Snapdragons. Many of the kids who attend practices have been doing so for years, and look forward to going back each week.
Coach Mike says his favorite part of coaching is helping kids who also have disabilities. His father, Denis Holmes, notes that Mike loves “being able to share his enthusiasm and his passion for basketball” while being able to coach. He sums up his son’s coaching in two words: spirit and enthusiasm. He says that Mike carries these gifts to work as well, at GBBN, an architectural firm.
A fellow coach, Brian Higgins, discussed how Mike has “done a fantastic job helping to be a leader for [the kids at Swish], helping them to learn the fundamentals of basketball, and teaching them how to come together as a team.”
Coach Brian and Coach Mike, along with Coach Bill Noe, have given the joy of competing to many young athletes who may not have otherwise had the opportunity to play a competitive sport. Coach Bill and Coach Brian have been involved in Swish Spirit for around eight years, and have watched young kids who at one time did not know how to dribble a basketball grow tremendously on and off the court. Coach Brian finds it incredibly rewarding that many kids have gained so much self-confidence from their participation in Cincy Swish. Coach Mike attributes this in part to of the “life lessons on community” that Swish teaches them. Coach Bill agrees, noting that the level of sportsmanship between teammates is incredible. The children involved in Swish truly care for one another.
As I attended a practice, I witnessed this firsthand as two young boys from opposing teams embraced upon one of them scoring a basket. Although Mike is competitive, he encourages teamwork and collaboration on and off the court.
Mike’s passion is clearly shown through his coaching. He smiled and said that coaching is great for both the kids involved and the parents and coaches. In the words of Mike himself, “For me, it’s good [to be] coaching. I love coaching. I love it.”
How A Dinner Changed Her Life
Margaret Kastner and I met at a meeting of the Cincinnati Blogger Network many months ago, and she has become one of my Good Things Going Around followers. We have kept in touch and talk when we see each other. She has always struck me as someone very easy to talk to, a kind and uplifting person. I am so glad I asked her for her story, as it gave me an opportunity to get to know an important part of her…and share it with you.
Originally from Detroit, Margaret came to Cincinnati in 1985 with her daughter and fiancé to put down new roots and begin a career with Procter & Gamble (P&G). By 2012 she was ready to do something very different. She retired and began designing and making beautiful sterling silver jewelry. She also started an online business called The Brooch & Bangle which specializes in one of a kind, handmade jewelry that uses a variety of gemstones.
Margaret’s life changing experience…in her own words
I remember our table at the Thunderbird Restaurant with its perfectly white linen table cloth and napkins. This was uptown dining in central Iowa in the 1980s. It was prime rib Sunday and the church crowd was filling the place after morning services.
My serious boyfriend Dave and I were joining his parents for dinner. I’d met them once briefly, but I suspected this dinner was their way of sizing me up as the prospective daughter-in-law. I was a ball of nerves.
Parents Tony and Olga were quite a bit older than Dave, and Tony was getting frail from a grueling schedule of kidney dialysis. Although he drove the car with a lead foot, Tony walked gingerly into the restaurant. Was he in pain right now? Should I offer to help him in some way? I felt all thumbs and tongue-tied. I honestly didn’t know how to act around someone who was so ill. I just hoped to avoid any awkward moments.
We decided that Dave’s parents should be first to get their dinner. When Tony got up from the table, Dave also got up without any hesitation. He guided his father to the buffet, and patiently held and filled Tony’s plate with each of the foods his father requested. This simple act of kindness was given with such love and respect.
I remember my immediate thought: “I’m not like that. Why?” I was accustomed to keeping to myself. And that had to change.
My formative years were spent in Detroit and its suburbs in the 1960s – 70s. The upside was that the Motor City was the automobile capital of the world, and the birthplace of Motown music. But in looking back, it felt like everyone was in a bad mood about something: strikes, crime, declining graduation rates, corrupt city government .. to name a few possibilities.
It seemed to me that while neighbors knew each other they weren’t really all that friendly. People walked while looking down, rarely make eye contact with anyone else. At the grocery store, people didn’t make small talk with others waiting in line. People kept to themselves.
The impact of that experience
Eventually it dawned on me that I was in the right place at the right time to help others pretty often. So, I just started paying attention to what was going on around me, began reaching out.
Like when, while on a business trip and sitting in the hotel lobby, an older woman had fallen in the parking lot and her calf had a deep cut. I asked my colleague to get the rental car, I got some paper towels to clean her up, and we drove her and her husband to an urgent care. Once I also got my car to drive a fellow P&Ger who was running in the pouring rain without an umbrella to her car in a far off parking lot.
So maybe I’ve been in training for even more important opportunities to reach out.
A few years ago, Dave’s mother moved from central Iowa to Cincinnati. Although in her 90s, she lives independently, but she cannot drive. I’ve taken her to a variety of doctors. We developed a routine of how we walk together, she with her cane in her right hand, and holding onto the crook of my arm with her left.
And this year, I found a way to raise awareness about organ donation in our area. As a Cincinnati LifeCenter ambassador, I talk with people about the incredible need for people to become organ donars in our tri-state area. I tell them about the Polycystic Kidney Disease that Dave’s father had, and that we now know Dave has inherited.
One of my favorite quotes is, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou
I use the last line as a yardstick to measure my day. In the evening, I think about how I may have made people feel that day. I’ve been known to drive back to a store to apologize for being less than kind to someone.
Everyone Likes To Be Appreciated
