children

Inclusion Starts With Me (And You)

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The United Cerebral Palsy of Greater Cincinnati brought to my attention an essay contest they held for children. The purpose? To encourage expression of the students’ own or observed feelings toward those who have disabilities, and the impact of those thoughts, with the goal that insight will foster togetherness.

Wow did that bring back memories. For eight years, my favorite annual project was helping to produce the Inclusion Leadership Awards Event – an event aimed at encouraging people to think outside the box, break down communication barriers, notice AND appreciate skills that had been under the radar. Our main communication goal was to inspire a world where people with and without disabilities work and play together not because they have to, but because they want to.

I was charged with developing those messages through the speaker, the script, the acceptance speeches and the videos so that guests would leave with a real sense of vision. In 2 ½ hours, attendees were to learn a lesson that would somehow change the world as they knew it. They heard stories of organizations that instinctively knew how to uncover talent, and of people whose abilities were no longer obscurities. Acceptance, we wanted them to realize, was not an abstract. Inclusion was not so much about ‘them’ but rather it was about ‘me’.

About ME. That’s a concept. Norman Kunc, our 2001 keynote speaker, had this to share. “In our society, we have already figured out that achievement and mastery lead to self-esteem. Where we have gone wrong is that we have forgotten that self-esteem can only come out of a context of belonging…we have idolized this ideal of independence and self-sufficiency. And what we have forgotten is that human beings need to belong…in the words of the music of Cheers, ‘where everyone knows our name and everyone’s glad we came.’ “

Actor Danny Woodburn, who normally makes a living provoking laughter, briefly left Hollywood in 2004 to remind our guests of a message from Mother Theresa, “Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible tragedy,” he said.

Danny told us his story – the story of an actor, comedian and activist whose talents were born in the hardships of a world unaccepting of a medical condition. All too well, he pointed out; he knows the sting of rejection and ridicule because he has lived it his entire life. He still gets scripts that refer to him as a ‘midget.’

But, he said, he is lucky. Through his work he has had the ability to influence attitudes. Offensive words, he’s found, are generally rooted in misunderstanding and he unabashedly corrects producers, directors and other actors. Of his character on the NBC hit Seinfeld, he said, “All it took for the success of my character was an intelligent exchange of ideas and sensitivity to the issues of little people. As a result, both Jerry (Seinfeld) and I felt included.”

Danny’s candor has bridged cultural and generational gaps, and altered misguided perceptions. (Please stay with me, I’m getting to the connection with the essay contest.) He continued to tell us about his job after college teaching drama to 20 kids between eight and ten years old.

That first day he devoted to talking about himself. Most of the questions were pretty typical. “How old are you? How tall are you? Why are you that way?,” they asked.
Then it came. The comment that would open the door behind which acceptance stood poised and waiting. An indignant girl told Danny in front of the class what her father thought of him.
“To my daddy, you are just a midget,” she said.

Danny looked at her and politely replied, “Well your daddy is wrong. Nobody is just anything and that word to me is like a hate word. And we know hate words can affect people, how they can hurt people and how it is wrong to use them.”

After that day, Danny told us, his students wanted to have their acting class – with Mr. Dan.

“I think back and I think all it took was that one day of communication, including them in who I am and nothing else needed to be said,” he went on.

Wow. That’s powerful stuff, and yet, it really is that simple.

And that is why I was so interested in the United Cerebral Palsy of Greater Cincinnati’s project aimed at opening minds and dialogue, and encouraging young people to think about the impact of their words and thoughts and actions.

“Changing the attitude of one school aged child has the ability to influence an entire generation.” said Susan S. Schiller, executive director.

UCP presented Nicole Roberts, a student from St. Mary’s School, with a family pass to Kings Island for her essay entitled ‘Inspiring Swimmers with Amazing Attitudes.’ Below is an excerpt.

For the most part, I am a typical teenage girl. Nothing scares me. I’m not afraid of the dark, I laugh at horror movies and I absolutely love to ride roller coasters, the higher the better. However, when my mom suggested I volunteer to help the Special Olympics Swim Team, I was a little nervous. It wasn’t that I was scared of people with disabilities; instead I was scared of how I would act around people with disabilities. What would I say? How would I interact with them? Would I stare?

Before I became acquainted with disabled people, I felt sorry for them. I was sad for them because they have to live with hardships that limit them for the rest of their lives. I thought they were completely different than I. Wow, was I wrong! Now I see that people with disabilities are just like everyone else. They love to watch the same television shows, they go to school, they go to the movies, and even have sleepovers with their friends. They have hopes and dreams for the future, just like we all do.

My work with these amazing people has taught me so much. However, the most important lesson I’ve learned is that people with disabilities have abilities too. It’s not about what they can’t do, but should be about what they can do, what they give to society and how they inspire others. I think of my fearless swimmers when I hear these words from Thomas Jefferson, ‘Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.’ They’ve showed me that attitude is the key as to whether you will succeed or fail. My new friends definitely have the right attitude!

Just as in Danny’s classroom, all it took for the word ‘disability’ to become transparent in Nicole’s eyes was for her to get to know others who do things differently.

Who have you gotten to know lately?

I feel truly blessed to be able to say I have gotten to know Danny, not just as an actor, speaker, comedian, and humanitarian, but as a friend. Such depth of human character is a true gift.

Success Comes In Many Measurements

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Lynn Collins and I met one cold December afternoon on the gymnasium floor at Cincinnati State. It was the iSPACE LEGO League Robotics Tournament. where the mood was nothing short of intense. Loud music ricocheted off the walls sending tremors across the floor, only the sheer concentration of what was happening almost drowned out any other noise than the sound of cheers rising from the stands. Seconds mattered as robots – less than 16 inches high – moved across tables, pulling or dumping objects, turning knobs and pushing levers. Two students just old enough to be called teens, programmers and builders as they were known in that competition, were standing just at the edge of each field making quick adjustments so their robot could change tasks and accomplish as many challenges as possible. Their teams stood just behind them on the floor. Some shouted in sheer emotion. Others stood erect in nervous tension. Referees in black and white striped shirts hovered. And then, in two and a half minutes, the horn blasted and it was over..at least that round. Teams had three tries that day to improve their scores.

Camera in hand, I was moving around television videographers trying to capture what I could. There was one group in particular that stood out to me. I remember watching as one of the students bent over his robot, fumbling to change its attachment. It seemed like a simple enough task inserting one piece into another, but it was a challenge for him. A woman sat in a folding chair several feet away. Her body was taught, leaning toward the table. Her bent elbows pressed into her thighs and her tense face was cradled in the stability of her cupped hands molded around her cheeks. Her eyes were fixed on that young man.

She and I were introduced later that day.

For 25 years, Lynn told me, she has been driving an hour each way to teach Cincinnati’s urban, inner city kids. This year with the closing of Burton Elementary, she’s been at Rockdale Academy teaching language arts to 7th and 8th graders. Many come to her classroom with deep emotional scars, baggage from travels to unthinkable places. Some have huge responsibilities caring for their siblings and others struggle just to survive. Some keep to themselves while their counterparts won’t let anyone push them around. 99% are living below poverty level. 98% receive free lunch.

These are the reasons why Lynn gets in her car day every day and why she stays late after the last bell in case anyone wants some extra help – or maybe just an attentive ear. She does all this because she sees in them the same potential she sees in her own children. They just need to be given the opportunity to succeed. Maybe that’s what makes Lynn so special in my eyes.

“My students don’t need sympathy,” she told me. “They need empathy and understanding. They’re not any different than any other kids their age.

“If you asked them, they would probably tell you I’m mean, but I’m fair,” she went on. “I don’t deviate from my expectations for any one of them. I hold each one to the highest of standards. I tell them ‘we’re all in this together. Your successes are my successes but if you fail, it’s my failure too.’ “

One day Lynn announced to all her students she was organizing a girls and a boys team to compete in iSPACE’s robotics tournament. Anyone could sign up, but if they did, Lynn required them to sign a contract committing to meet at least three nights a week, work together as a team, and of course show up for the actual event.

Eyes widened. There was a sense of eager anticipation. In the end, seven girls and three boys came to Cincinnati State that weekend. They had a long journey ahead so they didn’t waste time.

Two of the girls on the Rockdale Rockettes have cognitive delays. Math, one of the most important skills in programming robots, was about as difficult to understand for them as hieroglyphics are to me. They struggled, and I mean they really struggled to overcome their challenges. Lynn wasn’t willing to bend. One of their tasks was to program their robot to move forward on the table, stop, turn around and come back. The robot needed to make a 180 degree turn, a concept Tera wasn’t able to grasp despite years of trying in math class. Lynn drew pictures on a board to demonstrate it. The group drew their own pictures, brainstorming as they went. They focused as hard as it was possible to focus. Suddenly, a light bulb went off. “I got it! I understand!,” Tera screamed. The eighth grader could barely wait to tell her math teacher.

That moment was one Lynn will never forget. But then again, you get the feeling Lynn has many moments that will linger with her probably for the rest of her life.

The Rockdale Rockets included Samuel who is considered gifted, Tony who is visually impaired, and Charles who is autistic. They are three very differently abled and talented boys, bringing to the team their own strengths and perspectives. “We all have our own strengths and weaknesses,” said Lynn. “My job was just to help the kids identify their own strengths and guide them to know how to use them to benefit the whole.”

Simple enough. Tony has a great knack for programming. Computer skills are definitely his thing. Charles has such an incredibly mechanical mind. He could look at a mission, figure out what needed to be accomplished and build an attachment for the robot in a matter of minutes. And Samuel’s critical thinking, communication, and writing skills made him the natural leader of the group.

A second component to the tournament involved researching and developing a solution to a climate related problem, then sharing their ideas to people who could act upon them like community councils and legislators. Teams presented their projects and reports to judges the Saturday before the robotics challenge in the gym.

Lynn gathered the boys for a meeting. “You guys understand if Charles chooses to not participate, you need to take the lead,” she told them. Actually, she knew Charles wouldn’t participate because she had never heard his voice. A head nod and eye contact had been his form of communication for as long as she’d known him. She just wanted to acknowledge it was ‘ok’ for him to be his own way.

Then Lynn asked, “what is the last thing you say to the judges before you leave the room?” ‘Thank you’ was the boys’ answer.

But something completely out of the blue happened. Something no one, not even Lynn could have anticipated. She was sitting outside the doors that Saturday, nervously waiting while her teams explained their research to strangers. Suddenly the doors flew open and the boys sprinted toward her. “I couldn’t imagine what could have gone wrong,” Lynn said.

“Mrs. Collins, you won’t believe what happened,” Tony and Samuel blurted out in unison. “We turned around and said ‘thank you’ and then Charles turned around and said ‘thank you’ too.”

Charles stood before Lynn and grinned. There haven’t been many times in Lynn’s life where she’s been at a loss of words, but that was definitely one.

“We were never in this to win the highest score. There was no way I’d tell my students there was a total of 400 points. Our goal was to increase our points with each try, learning to improve compromising and communication skills along the way. The Teamwork Award was what I wanted for them,” Lynn said.

Did they accomplish what they set out to achieve? They sure did. The Rockdale Rockettes went from 9 points in their first round to 61 by the end of the day. The Rockdale Rockets started at 20 points and scored 51 points in the third round. And that Teamwork Award? The Rockettes won a 2nd place Teamwork Award while the Rockets won the Judge’s Award given to a group that demonstrates fortitude and diligence.

And by the way, Lynn was also recognized as one of iSPACE’s 2008 outstanding coaches.

PLEASE NOTE: Students names have been changed at Lynn’s request. Unfortunately, I didn’t know I’d be writing her story when we met and did not take her photo. Please continue reading the blog for a look at how Lynn encourages success in her classroom.

Lynn Collin’s Approach To Inclusion In The Classroom

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At Rockdale Academy, kids with all abilities are included in the same classroom. For Lynn Collins, a teacher of 7th and 8th graders, knowing how to help every student succeed just seems to be instinctual.

How does she include everyone? For starters, each day begins with a paragraph she writes on the chalk board. She asks her class to help her find the mistakes…and the students who get called on first are the ones who may not otherwise speak up. It’s important for Lynn that everyone starts their day with success.

“Disability should not be an excuse.Every child has his or her own strength and I just do what I need to do to help each one,” Lynn said, quickly correcting herself, “but they also know that in my classroom they have to work for success. It won’t be handed to them. Not everyone has the same assignment or is expected to fulfill the assignment in the same way, but they are expected to do what is asked of them to the best of their ability.”

Since Lynn has a student with a vision impairment, all reading is done out loud and Lynn will plan ahead by ordering a large print book so he can participate without any disruption. When she’s giving a test, Charles, who has autism, knows he needs to only answer the questions she draws a circle around. For the students who have cognitive disabilities, she may reverse rolls, having them ask her questions. And for others who have a disability that affects their written language, she’ll ask them to draw or explain it instead.


A Lesson In Giving Back

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When it comes to making a difference, every little bit helps. Thus was a valuable lesson kids, ages 6 to 12, in the Gamble-Nippert YMCA’s homeschool program learned recently.

For three months they’d been asking their parents to come a little early so they could complete laps around the gym, all on their own initiative. They walked and skipped and hopped, sometimes as much as 10 times around before they started the day’s lesson.

However, this project wasn’t just about getting in shape and having fun, it was about doing something good for other people. For each lap the kids counted, their friends and family pledged them a penny, or contributed a non-perishable food item. Step-by-step, coin-by-coin, the donations added up. By the end, they had collectively raised 10,300 pennies (and 75 pounds of food).

Judy Haverkos, co-coordinator for the Gamble-Nippert YMCA program, said the students chose to give their earnings to Santa Maria Community Services. The food went to the Manna Food Pantry. H.A. Musser, Jr., Santa Maria president explained to the group why their efforts were so important.

Did the kids understand they were doing a good thing? Absolutely! “I like helping people,” said Aiden.

“Community service helps teach them character values and teamwork. Coupling that with having fun while being active is really a great teaching tool,” said Cindy Klopp, the other co-coordinator.

The coin project was just one of many enrichment activities for children in YMCA homeschool programs. Haverkos said their group is studying artists, helping the branch ‘go green’, and learning American Sign Language.

Pictured are kids who helped raise money – Victoria Freudiger; Hannah Musser; Oscar Allen; Aiden Bezdek; Samuel Musser; Nathan DeVoe. David and Rose Homelle; Adriana and Alexandria Norton; Mary Nerswick; and Joe Dupont also helped fund raise but weren’t available for the photo.

We Can learn A Lot From A Child

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If you haven’t yet heard about Mattie Stepanek, let me tell you about him. In June 2004, three years before he would have been old enough to drive, he lost his brave battle with a rare and fatal neuromuscular disease.

In his life, he experienced the difficult loss of three siblings. He endured physical, emotional and spiritual pain. But Mattie was an astute young boy who had profound wisdom about things that matter most. He celebrated life every day. He recognized the beauty in everyday circumstance and he lived knowing happiness is never out of reach, if you just look with your heart.

Mattie began sharing his thoughts when he was just three years old. His poems and essays are among the most beautiful I’ve ever read. They are his legacy, his heartsongs.

Believing in Someday

Maybe,
Someday,
We will all join hands
And live together…
Helping each other,
Loving each other,
Maybe,
Someday,
We will all make the world
A much better place…
And be like a gigantic,
Smoothly rushing river of peace –
A loving circle that nothing can break,
Maybe,
Someday,
We may start with just one person,
And one permanent peace agreement
Within one’s self, within one’s world.
Personal peace can then spread
Within and between the families,
Then within and between communities,
And then within and around the whole world.
Maybe,
Someday,
We can become
As close to perfect
As anything and anyone can get.
Let us each join our own Heartsong
With this old song of the heart, and believe…
“Let there be peace on earth,
And let it begin with me.”

Written in 2000 when Mattie was 9

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